HTLJ: Something to Prove
by Arianna18
Summary: No summary available


* * *

Salmoneous had commandeered a wagon following their successful...and heroic...rescue of the bride from the renegade centaurs. 'Not that Hercules thought it was particularly heroic,' the real estate agent thought with a sideways glance at the demigod as they rode along the quiet, dusty road. But, Sal hadn't done anything quite that brave, or noble, in his life before, and he still shivered to think about standing firm beside Hercules to instruct the blind hero on distances and directions. Sal shook his head in mute wonder at the demigod's skills...imagine being able to shoot arrows accurately when you can't even see.

"It's going to make a great chapter in the scroll...." Salmoneous mused to himself.

"Hmm? What scroll?" Hercules asked, cocking his head in Sal's direction to indicate he was listening.

Startled, unaware he'd spoken aloud, Sal, a man who was ever alert to new dinar-making enterprises, explained enthusiastically. "Well, Hercules, I've decided to write a scroll... 'The Legendary Adventures of Hercules,' and this last adventure will make a wonderful, exciting chapter! Can't you just see," the entrepreneur winced a little at his poor choice of words, but carried manfully on, "er...imagine how popular such a scroll would be! Why, people will be screaming for a copy!"

Sal smiled happily to himself, visions of dinars dancing in his head. And, he rather enjoyed the vision of how he'd describe his own heroic actions...why, women would be falling all over him! Women always loved heroes! Or so it always seemed to him.

Consequently, he missed the look of profound distaste which crossed the demigod's face. "Ah...actually, I don't think that's such a great idea...." Hercules said, trying for a reasonable tone when what he felt like doing was protesting in horror. A humble man, the hero could think of few things less appealing than having a scroll written about him.

"Now, now, my good friend, I understand these things better than you do!" Sal soothed, missing the point entirely. "You'll just have to tell me the stories of your adventures and I'll take care of the rest...you'll see, it will be easy!"

Herc rolled his sightless eyes toward the heavens, wishing he was not trapped here on the seat of this wagon, wishing he could run for the hills. But, for now, he was dependent on Sal's help, and, sighing, he knew he was grateful for it. He just didn't want to be trapped into having to tell about his encounters with monsters and other trouble makers. What was there to tell anyway? 'There was this monster, it was threatening people and so we killed it.' Not much of a story in Herc's opinion.

And, as the day wore on, with Sal pressing for details and getting only the barest, and grudging, outlines from the demigod, the aspiring bard was beginning to wonder if it was such a great idea after all. Hercules really did make it all sound, well, boring. Sighing, he decided he'd just have to content himself with asking other people to describe what they remembered of Hercules' exploits...and he could make the rest up.

Hercules found the trip a trial. Despite his normal, confident and easy-going demeanor, inside his emotions were teeming, boiling and bubbling over one another, making it hard to know just exactly how he did feel, and very hard to concentrate on what was going on around him. Sometimes anger would surface, fury at having been victimized this way. He hated the helplessness he felt, hated having to be dependent. Sometimes, he felt the fear blossom, fear that maybe this wouldn't get better. Fear that even if it did, it would take weeks or months. There was no way of really knowing when the effects of the poison would wear off. Most of all, he felt vulnerable to attack and that was something he wasn't used to feeling.

Anger, fury, helplessness, fear, dependence and vulnerability were not emotions Hercules welcomed or tolerated well. He forced himself to push them back and away, forced himself to slow his breathing, to listen to what Sal was saying and to try to figure out what their environment was like from his senses of sound and smell. It didn't improve his disposition to have to talk about his 'exploits' and 'adventures', as Sal described his experiences. He didn't do what he did for glory, for personal aggrandizement. He did what he did because of who he was, and what he could do to make a difference, to make the world a better, safer place. The idea of promoting his accomplishments, as if he deserved special notice, appalled him. But, Salmoneus was helping him, and was well intentioned, essentially harmless. Hercules just hoped that this scheme would be discarded as quickly as had Sal's other projects when something else occurred to him. In the meantime, the hero gave as dreary and as spartan an accounting of his activities as was possible.

So, as the hours wore on, he found himself increasingly anxious to get to the end of this journey. It was with a sense of profound relief that Hercules realized they were at long last getting close to their destination when Sal pulled up the horses at the crossroads, and looked up the long hill toward a small cottage on its rise.

"I think this might be the place," Salmoneous said uncertainly with a frown. With the critical eye he'd acquired in his current real estate business he evaluated the property. It looked decidedly... unimpressive. Poor, actually, and a bit rundown. Not a place for a famous son of Zeus to be staying.

But, Herc sat up straight, smiling a little in his eagerness as he confirmed the details. "A crossroads about a mile from Thebes, a long hill with a small cabin on the top...with a forge behind the cabin? Trees on the far side?"

"Yeeessss," Salmoneous confirmed, still hesitating. "Look, Hercules, I have to say that this does not look like the sort of place where someone of your stature and fame should be staying. Why don't I just take you on into town, get us some rooms at their best inn, have a fine meal with a good amphora of wine...."

Hercules cut in, raising his hands in the air to forestall his friend's suggestions, "No, thanks all the same. But, no. My best friend lives there...I know I'll be fine with him. Please...just take me up to the cabin."

"Well, if you're sure," Sal reluctantly agreed as he started up the horses again. His first impressions didn't improve any as they approached the buildings. Not that there was anything wrong with the snug, thatched cottage with a small front porch. It was just very...ordinary. In just a few minutes, Sal stopped the wagon in the yard outside the cottage door.

"Hey, buddy!" Hercules called out, surprised Iolaus hadn't come out to meet them.

"It doesn't look like anyone's here," Salmoneous told him, doubtfully. "Maybe I should just take you into town...."

"No!" Hercules cut him off, then continued in a placating, reassuring tone, "No...really. I'll be fine. I'm sure he's just out hunting and will be back soon." Taking a firm grip on the edge of the seat, the demigod shifted with the intention of climbing down off the wagon. The trip was finally over and he was where he wanted to be.

"Here, let me help you!" Salmoneous exclaimed, scrambling down from his side of the wagon and coming around to guide the demigod to the ground.

"Thanks," said Hercules, covering his ever increasing frustration with his helplessness with his habitual courtesy. "Now, I think there's a couple of old chairs on the porch...if you'd just steer me in the right direction?"

"All right," mumbled the unhappy real estate salesman and aspiring bard. Taking Herc's arm, he pulled the demigod along. "Watch your step!" he remembered to say, after Hercules had stumbled a little on the unexpected rise to the porch.

Finally, with a sigh, Herc found himself settled in one of the familiar old chairs. 'Gods, it's good to be home,' he thought with relief. Iolaus's home was as familiar to him as his own, and for now, in his current situation, he knew this was the best place for him to be, better in fact than the home he'd grown up in.

Hercules smiled toward Salmoneous and reached out to take the man's hand, fumbling a little until he managed an arm's clasp, saying with all sincerity, "Thank you, my friend...for bringing me home, and for standing by me...that took a lot of courage. I will always be grateful to you."

A little abashed, Salmoneous blushed then preened at the praise. "You're welcome, Hercules." But, he stopped short of saying, 'any time', because he really didn't ever want to be in such a terrifying situation again...not ever. Once was very much more than enough for the self proclaimed coward Sal considered himself to be. He didn't see what Herc saw for all his physical blindness...a man who had been honestly, and quite reasonably, terrified, but who had faced the danger and did what needed to be done. That was the definition of 'hero' in Herc's book. A man didn't need to go looking for trouble to be respected by the demigod. What counted was how he acted when trouble found him.

Herc smiled as he continued, "Look, you don't need to wait here with me...I'm sure my friend will be back soon. It must be getting on in the afternoon, and I know you want to get into Thebes and find a place to stay before night falls. I'd invite you to stay here, but there's just the floor...."

Shuddering at that option, Salmoneous hastened to reassure the demigod, "No, no, don't worry about me. I have business in the city and should be on my way." He looked around again, a little reluctant to leave until he knew Hercules would be all right. Sal really didn't like leaving him alone. For all his bluster, and his own disparaging self image, he realized the hero was vulnerable and it didn't feel right to just go off and leave him. What if Hercules' friend was away, and didn't come back for days?

Sensing the man's dilemma, Herc urged him, "Go on...I'll be fine. Really."

Sighing and nodding, still reluctant, Sal looked around and with considerable relief spotted a man some distance away coming out of the forest. Squinting to make out some details of the man's appearance, he asked, "Er...does you friend have blond hair and would he be carrying what looks like a brace of rabbits?"

"Yep, that sounds like him," Herc confirmed. "Can you see him?"

"Uh huh, he'll be here in a few minutes. He's just come out of the forest. So, I guess I'll be on my way. Take care, Hercules! And, I'll let you know how the scroll is coming along," he said as he patted Herc's shoulder in the familiar way of an old friend. Without more ado, Salmoneous crossed the bare yard and climbed back up onto the wagon, turning the team and heading away down the hill.

Hercules was so glad that Iolaus was on his way, he didn't even react to the reference to the dreaded scroll. He'd done well in hiding how unnerving he found his helplessness and vulnerability to be, but it was exhausting. But, he didn't have to pretend here. Iolaus knew he wasn't perfect and had seen him through tough times before. On the rare occasions when he'd been physically hurt, it was always Iolaus who had been there to care for him.

But, even knowing Iolaus would welcome him, he felt a nervousness, unsettled at having arrived with no warning, needing help. He'd been gone quite a while, and he knew he'd been holding Iolaus at a distance for sometime. It didn't seem right to show up now and just expect his old friend to welcome him with open arms. But, gods, he needed the safety and unconditional acceptance Iolaus had always given him. As he heard the familiar whistling, he prepared himself, taking a deep breath and trying on a hesitant smile.

"Hercules!" Iolaus called out, surprised and delighted to see his friend. He'd seen the wagon leave, but hadn't recognised the driver, and he'd assumed it was just someone seeking directions who had left when they found no one home. "I wasn't expecting you!"

Herc stood at Iolaus' voice and turned toward him, standing a bit awkwardly, his head unconsciously cocked a little toward Iolaus' voice. "I know this is a surprise," he said with a hesitant smile, "but I wondered if you'd mind if I stayed with you for a couple of days."

The bright grin of welcome on Iolaus' face faded, replaced by a puzzled frown as he studied his friend, seeing the awkward stance, the glance that didn't quite meet his eyes. "Herc? Are you alright?" he asked, with a sudden sharp stab of concern, as he dropped the string of rabbits and crossed the short length of the porch to grip his buddy's arm.

"Uh, well, a little worse for wear...but, I'll be good as new in a few days," Hercules reassured him, bringing his own hand up to Iolaus' shoulder...fumbling a little before he found a secure grip.

Iolaus' throat went dry, and his breath caught in his throat as he gazed up at his partner's eyes. "You can't see..." he breathed, horrified.

Hercules heard the alarm, and hastened to reassure his friend, as he tightened his grip a little on Iolaus' shoulder, "It's alright, Iolaus...it's only temporary. But...well, I just wanted to be here until the effect wears off. You don't mind, do you?"

"Mind?" Iolaus repeated. "Of course I don't mind. I'd mind if you hadn't come here. Look," he said, guiding Hercules gently back to the chair, "sit down and tell me what happened."

"Well, I was on my way back here, when I heard that Penelope was getting married...you remember her sister, Irene, who died at the Siege of Corinth?" When Iolaus indicated he did, Hercules continued, "Well, anyway, I decided to head there first, you know, to join in the celebrations," Hercules explained. Sighing a little wearily, he continued, "It turned out that Nemis was determined to disrupt the wedding and kidnap Penelope...."

"Nemis? You don't mean the brother of the centaur, Nessus? The one who attacked Deianeira?" Iolaus interrupted, frowning as he reflected that violent and possessive behaviour seemed to run in that family.

"Yeah, I'm afraid so. Anyway, when I showed up unexpectedly, he and his friends figured I'd be in the way. So, to put me out of commission, a friend of his poisoned my wine...and the poison caused this blindness." Hercules paused and swallowed back the anger, and once again reassured his friend, "But, really, Iolaus, it's supposed to clear up in a few days."

"How do you know that?" Iolaus asked, worried.

"Lyla, the woman who gave me the poisoned wine, ended up regretting her actions and told me that it would wear off in a few days," Hercules explained.

"I see," Iolaus murmured, hoping to the gods she'd been telling the truth. He studied Herc for a moment, suspecting Hercules was stressing that there was nothing to worry about more for his own benefit as much as to reassure his partner. 'Well, he has every reason to be scared,' Iolaus thought, 'Gods, it has to be terrifying.'

However, Iolaus figured what his buddy needed most at that moment was to have Iolaus accept that it was only temporary, his acceptance a reassurance in itself. Accordingly, he figured it would help Hercules to focus on more mundane matters like how he'd gotten here, and then he'd get Herc to tell him the whole story. Talking it out would put the experience in some perspective, distance it a little and let Herc get a handle on it, not be immersed in it. Knowing Herc, Iolaus was pretty sure there was more to learn about what had happened.

"Who was that who dropped you off?" Iolaus asked, wondering if the stranger had been involved in the events of the wedding or was just a helpful citizen.

Smiling a little, Hercules explained about his acquaintance with Salmoneous. Despite his sense that Sal was a bit of a con man, he wanted to be fair to the essentially goodhearted man, to let Iolaus know he was brave and honourable, well, in a crunch, Sal was brave and honourable. So, Hercules ended up telling his buddy everything that had happened, something he might not have done had he thought about it more, partly out of his tendency to minimize his deeds, and mostly because he'd've realized that Iolaus would likely give him a hard time about what he'd done. However, he didn't think about it, having enough on his mind, and unable to see Iolaus' face, he didn't know his best friend paled as the story went on...a feeling of appalled horror growing in Iolaus' gut as the details emerged and he fully understood the risks Hercules had taken.

When Hercules had finished his story, there was a long silence. Frowning, he turned his head toward where he knew Iolaus was sitting, "Iolaus?"

"I'm here," Iolaus said shortly, his voice tight. He didn't want to yell at Hercules, not now when he'd just arrived, not while he was hurting. Because Iolaus wasn't fooled by his friend's glib assurances. He could see the strain on Herc's face, the slight skittering of his eyes that always happened when he was anxious or worried. Time enough to give Herc hell for being stupid in the morning, after he'd had some rest. Herc didn't need a lecture now.

"Is something wrong?" Hercules asked, wondering at his friend's brusqueness.

"No...no, what could be wrong?" Iolaus tried for light, teasing sarcasm, but his voice was strained. "You get poisoned, blinded, almost killed after taking impossible risks. No, Herc, nothing's wrong... everything sounds about normal."

It was all he could do to hold his tongue. Gods, what had Herc been thinking to take on those guys when he couldn't even see? The thought of what might have happened made Iolaus feel physically ill.

Needing to get a rein on his own emotions, the hunter took refuge in the details of normal routine. "Look, I'm really glad you came here. Let me get you a mug of ale, and then I'll rustle up something for us to eat," he said, to change the subject. "You just take it easy."

Iolaus was up and into the cabin like a shot, leaving Hercules wondering just exactly why Iolaus was so angry. Because the demigod knew his friend was angry. Herc knew every nuance of his friend's voice, could read his silences as well as his words, at least well enough to get a sense of what Iolaus was feeling, even if he was not always sure why. Hercules sighed with frustration as he closed his eyes and shook his head.

Gods, he hated this. If this was a normal visit, he'd have followed Iolaus into the cabin, helped pull the meal together, the two of them talking freely about the local news, or just teasing and joking around. Instead, he was sitting out here, locked in darkness, knowing his buddy was pissed off about something. But, whether Iolaus was mad at him for taking risks, or the people who had done this, the demigod had no idea. Leaning back in his chair, trying to relax, Herc figured that whatever it was, Iolaus would let him know sooner or later.

By the time he'd come back with an clay mug of ale, Iolaus had calmed down, promising himself that he and Herc would have a serious talk once Hercules was better. Coming back out onto the porch, he said pleasantly to his friend, "Herc, hold out your hand, I've brought you some ale."

Hercules obligingly lifted a hand and Iolaus fitted the mug into it. "Is there anything we need to do for your eyes?" Iolaus asked, anxious concern in his voice. "Do we need to bathe them regularly?" He thought Herc's eyes looked red and irritated and he knew serious damage could result if the proper care wasn't taken.

Hercules took a welcome sip of the beverage, parched from the day's dusty travel, then nodded, "Yeah...I'm supposed to wash them out every couple of hours."

"How long has it been since you last..." Iolaus began, but didn't need to continue when he saw the chagrined look cross his buddy's face. "Too long," he sighed, shaking his head in mute exasperation.

Turning back to the cabin to get a basin, he emerged moments later with a bowl full of water from the small barrel he kept inside, an empty mug and some clean rags. Dropping to one knee beside the demigod, he set the basin down and then filled the mug with water.

"You know, Hercules, it's really stupid to take risks with your eyes," he lectured quietly, as he stood beside his friend. "You seem to forget that you're not indestructible."

"Come on, Iolaus, don't start," Hercules complained defensively, knowing his buddy was right.

"Uh huh," grunted Iolaus, resting a hand filled with a rag lightly on the demigod's head, "Okay, hero, tilt your head back. I'm going to pour a little water at a time over your eyes. I know it will be uncomfortable, but try to keep your eyes open."

Hercules obligingly leaned his head back, wincing and blinking as Iolaus slowly poured water over his eyes, trailing a gradual flow of clean water into each one, catching the moisture with the rag and then dabbing delicately, to remove the dried dirt of the road that had encrusted around Herc's dry and reddened eyes.

"That should hold you for a while," Iolaus said when he'd finished, leaning down to pick up the basin and tossing the water in it into the yard. "Give me a few minutes to get us something to eat."

Hercules murmured a quiet, "Thanks," as Iolaus turned and went back into the cabin. Herc began to wonder if he'd just imagined Iolaus' anger...certainly, the pleasant tones, the helpfulness, even gentleness when Iolaus had bathed his eyes seemed normal enough. But, the demigod was certain he sensed a tension...maybe it was just that his buddy was worried about him, and felt awkward himself about how to handle it. Gods, he wished he could see.

Not long after, Iolaus came back to help him into the cabin, letting Hercules take a grip on his arm. Inside, he led Herc to the plain table and got him settled on one of the four chairs. He then ladled soup into a bowl that he placed before his friend, together with a few chunks of day old bread.

"It's not fancy," Iolaus said, "but it'll be easy to eat. You can just lift the bowl and drink from it. It's gotta be hard trying to spoon up or stab food you can't see...."

Hercules gave him a grateful grin, "Thanks...this is easier." Hercules took a tentative sip of the soup while Iolaus was ladling up his own bowl from the kettle hanging over the fire in the small hearth. "It's good," the demigod said appreciatively, unable to completely hide the note of surprise in his voice. Iolaus' lack of talent for cooking had been a source of amusement between them for years.

Iolaus grinned as he nodded, then realized Herc couldn't see him. "It should be...your mother made it. She brought the pot of soup over yesterday. You know she's convinced that I don't eat right when I'm on my own," Iolaus explained. Thoughtfully, he scratched his cheek as he gazed at Hercules. "You don't want Alcmene to know about this, do you? That's why you came here."

Hercules shrugged and nodded, "She'd just worry and fuss all over me...I didn't want to upset her."

Iolaus didn't reply, and Herc could hear him spoon up his own meal. Reaching for a hunk of the bread, the demigod chewed on it, wishing he could see. He knew, then, that Iolaus was upset about something...the silence was a dead giveaway, even if his abrupt comments and strained tone earlier hadn't already revealed that his friend was angry. Sighing, Herc swallowed the bread, and said quietly, "Do you want to tell me what's bothering you?"

Again there was a silence. Finally, Iolaus responded pleasantly, "Nope, not tonight." As he continued, his genuine concern for his friend echoed in his voice, "Frankly, you look exhausted. When you're done eating, we'll fix up your eyes again, and then you can crash in my room...you need to get some sleep."

"I don't want to put you out of your own bed!" Hercules protested, raising a hand to refuse the largesse.

"It's not a problem, Herc," Iolaus replied reassuringly. "You look overdue for a few creature comforts... I'll bet you've been sleeping on the ground for weeks. Honestly, I don't mind bedding down here in front of the fire."

Hercules heard the concern in his buddy's voice, just as he'd felt it in the gentle way Iolaus had bathed his eyes earlier. Letting out a long sigh, he decided to just accept it, gratefully. His friend was right. It'd been tough the last couple of days, pretending to be fine, unable to vent his frustration or his fear. Even when he knew it was only temporary, being blind terrified him...and he wouldn't really believe it was temporary until he got his sight back. He really was exhausted and a decent night's sleep would do him good.

"Thanks," he said with a crooked smile, as he reached for his bowl and sipped some more of the soup, letting the tension leave his body. He reminded himself that he didn't have to pretend when he was here. He didn't have to feel awkward or uncomfortable...because here, he knew where he was. He could find his way around. And, if he stumbled over something, Iolaus wouldn't mind. He never had to play the hero for his best friend. Hercules wondered if Iolaus ever fully understood what a relief that was, and how much he appreciated it...valued it. Somehow, he suspected his friend didn't know, because Iolaus had never thought of Hercules as the demigod son of Zeus. Iolaus just thought of him as his best friend, someone he'd known almost all his life. Herc had no secrets from him, had no need to be anyone other than himself.

When they'd finished eating, Iolaus treated Herc's eyes again, then guided Herc into the bedroom and pushed him down on the bed. Kneeling, he undid the laces of his friend's boots.

"Iolaus...you don't have to do that," Hercules said, surprised, reaching out a hand to stop his friend.

Iolaus just brushed the hand away, as he said matter-of-factly, "Don't worry about it, Herc. It's easier for me to undo the knots and to get these off you than for you to struggle with them. Would you just relax?"

His boots off, Hercules laid down on the bed and Iolaus covered him with a quilt, tucking him in as if he were a child. Iolaus covered his solicitous actions with a wry, jocular tone, "There now, you just go to sleep...you're safe here."

Herc reached out to grab his buddy's arm before Iolaus turned away. Quite seriously, he said, "I know... that's why I came...thanks, Iolaus, for everything."

Touched, Iolaus just swallowed and patted his shoulder. "If you hadn't've come, I'd've tracked you down and kicked your butt. I mean it, big guy...get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

Back in the main room, Iolaus mopped up the water that had spilled onto the floor when he'd bathed Herc's eyes, cleared up the remains of the meal, banked the fire, and put blankets and a pillow on the floor in front of the hearth. Laying down, his arms crossed behind his head, Iolaus thought again about what Herc had told him about what had happened, his gut clenching at the danger Hercules had been in.

'Gods...it can't go on like this,' he thought, 'I have to make Herc see that.'

At that thought, he winced, wondering how long it would be before Hercules could 'see' anything again. He knew Herc hadn't wanted him to fuss around him or make a big deal of it...but, he was frightened for his friend. What if it took weeks, or months...what if they'd lied to him and he never got his sight back? Iolaus took a long breath and let it out slowly, forcing himself to relax. He wouldn't be any good to Hercules if he couldn't handle this. Whatever happened, how ever long it took, they'd work it out.

Just before he fell asleep, he thought again about Herc's words, that he'd come to Iolaus' place because he knew he was safe here. Simple words, but Herc wouldn't likely ever know how much they had meant...or how much Iolaus had needed to hear them.

* * *

The next morning, Hercules woke to the sounds of Iolaus chopping wood behind the cottage. He got up and felt his way out of the cabin, onto the porch. The air felt light, and he could feel the slight warmth of the early sun on his face. A few minutes later, Iolaus came back around the corner, a stack of small logs and kindling in his arms. Seeing Herc up, he smiled, "Morning, sunshine...so you finally decided to get up?"

Herc raised a sardonic eyebrow at the gentle teasing. "I figured the ungodly noise you were making was your subtle way of telling me it was morning," he replied good-naturedly.

Iolaus just chuckled softly as he headed into the cabin with the wood to build up the fire. "Hungry?" he called out.

Hercules hesitated, wondering what breakfast would consist of. Iolaus' favourite way to start the day was with a good substantial meal, usually including meat, whereas the demigod preferred something light, like fruit. But, this wasn't the time to be fussy. "Sure," he called back, turning to find his way back into the cabin. Inside, he felt his way to the table and took the same chair he'd used the night before.

He could hear Iolaus frying something and he suppressed a sigh. Yep, a good hearty breakfast. Iolaus had been watching Herc's face and grinned, pretty much knowing what his buddy was thinking. "Your breakfast is already on the table, Herc," he said mildly. "Right in front of you."

Cocking his head a little in silent enquiry, the demigod reached out gingerly, and broke into a grin when he felt an apple, an orange and a pear. Picking up the pear, he said, "Thanks...just what I wanted!"

Iolaus dished up his own meal of fried eggs, putting it, a couple of chunks of bread and two mugs of water on the table, before sitting down himself. Watching his friend, Iolaus could see that Herc was in much better shape than he'd been the night before. The rest had done him good. Iolaus didn't really fully appreciate that just being with him was what had helped the demigod relax to the point where he could deal with his temporary infirmity without feeling horrified, or if he did, having to hide it. Somehow, just being around Iolaus always made Hercules feel better.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Iolaus asked his friend.

Hercules shrugged, not having thought about it. "I don't know...what would you have been doing if I hadn't shown up on your doorstep?"

"Nothing much. I have a few things to work on in the forge, and I've been whittling some toys to sell in town," Iolaus said, getting up to clear the table when they'd finished eating. He filled a bowl with water, grabbed up a mug and a clean rag, and returned to his friend's side. "Come on outside, Herc, for me to tend to your eyes."

Obligingly, Hercules rose and led the way out to the porch. He had to feel his way through the doorway, but Iolaus just waited quietly. He knew it was important for Herc to do as much as he could for himself. Hercules hated being dependent, couldn't stand feeling helpless and no one knew that better than Iolaus. When Iolaus began to treat his eyes, Herc tensed up again, as if the need to be helped reminded him again of how helpless he was.

Frowning with sympathy, Iolaus asked quietly as he worked, "How are you doing...I mean, really."

Hercules shrugged, trying for nonchalance, as he responded with a deliberately light tone, "I'm fine. I know this is only temporary."

"Don't, Herc," Iolaus chided gently as he finished drying his friend's eyes.

"'Don't' what?" Hercules asked, pretending he didn't know.

"Act like everything's fine, when I know it isn't," Iolaus said, putting a hand on his buddy's shoulder. "You don't have to pretend with me, you know that."

Herc lifted his head, his sightless eyes moving as if he was scanning the horizon, looking for something. Needing to share the burden of emotion he'd been carrying for days, he turned his face toward Iolaus, one fist clenching unconsciously as he grated, "I just feel so angry...furious that they did this to me...and I don't know what to do about it. I want to hit something, but it wouldn't do any good. Gods, Iolaus, what will I do if...." His voice cracked then, and he bit his lip, blinking against the tears of the very desperate fear that threatened.

Iolaus squeezed his shoulder gently, reassuringly, as he said quietly, "If it takes a while to clear up...if it doesn't get better, we'll work it out." Iolaus massaged his friend's shoulder, feeling the tension, sensing the pain, as he looked up toward the sky for inspiration. "But, remember, Herc...you've got your blood on your side. You heal better and faster than any mortal ever could. Whatever they gave you, it's not likely to be permanent. If we need to, we'll go see your cousin, Aesclepius...there isn't anything he can't cure."

Herc lowered his head, and took a deep breath. Nodding a little, he swallowed, then admitted quietly, "I'm scared, Iolaus...I know it's supposed to get better...but...."

"But, until it does, you have every right to be scared. Gods, Herc...I can't begin to imagine how hard this must be for you. Whatever you want, whether it's to yell, or just be quiet, to talk about other things, or about what we'll do if it takes longer than they said...whatever you want, buddy, I'm here," Iolaus assured him.

When Hercules raised his head, there was an expression of vulnerability on his face that very few other people had ever seen. His head canted a little toward Iolaus, he murmured, his voice tight with despair, "I don't know...I don't know what to do. I feel so helpless. Useless..."

Iolaus went down on one knee beside Hercules, one hand gripping his buddy's arm, as he replied, "Right now, you don't have to do anything...right now, all you need to do is rest and get better." Iolaus grinned then, a teasing note coming into his voice, "And, Herc, if facing up to those renegades, and taking them out with arrows, fighting Nemis and rescuing Penelope and her bridesmaid is an example of someone who is either helpless or useless, well, then, the gods help the rest of us."

Seeing the shadow of a smile lighten his partner's bleak expression, Iolaus' voice changed again, to a reassuring tone, as he continued, "It's only natural to be angry, and to be afraid...it's okay to feel these things, Herc. But, don't borrow trouble, buddy...don't torment yourself with fears about what might be. It's likely that you'll be just fine, and probably sooner than you think right now. But, whatever happens, you know you don't have to face the future alone. Whatever happens, you know I'll be right beside you."

Staring into the darkness, Hercules took a shuddering breath. Laying a hand over Iolaus', he whispered hoarsely, "I know...and knowing that is what keeps me going."

"You're going to be okay, Herc," Iolaus assured him, and they both knew he meant regardless of whether Hercules got his sight back or not.

Hercules nodded, and drew Iolaus' hand away from his arm as he leaned back in his chair. But, he didn't let go of his friend's hand...he held on, and the strength he drew from his partner's firm grip eased his fear, allowing him to let go of the tension, the control he'd been exerting over himself...giving him the first sense of peace that he'd had since the darkness had descended upon him.

* * *

Later that day, while Iolaus was again treating his eyes, Hercules remembered how irritated Iolaus had been the day before. "You never did tell me what was bothering you yesterday," he said, wondering if he was wise to revive the discussion or if he should have just let it pass.

Iolaus paused in his ministrations a moment, then continued with a small sigh. "I was angry," he said without further elaboration, wondering if this was really the time to talk about it all, but knowing Herc would just keep at him until he explained.

"About what?" Hercules asked, honestly curious.

There was a silence as Iolaus tried to put his thoughts in some reasonable order. "About the chances you take. Herc, you can't keep going on like this," he said, trying to keep his voice calm and reasonable.

Hercules frowned. "Like what?"

Exasperated, Iolaus tossed the rag into the basin and dropped into the chair beside his friend. "You try to take on the world by yourself, no matter what the obstacles or dangers. What would you have done if this, Salmoneus was it, hadn't've been there? Gods, Herc, you could have been killed."

Hercules shook his head, not understanding Iolaus' frustration. "I was at a wedding! I didn't expect this to happen," he said, waving one hand up toward his face, "and I couldn't just let Nemis hurt the women."

"Oh no, not the great Hercules," Iolaus replied caustically. "No, even blind, our hero has to rush off to the rescue, take on the bad guys and bring back the maidens in distress. Gods, Herc, weren't there any other men in that settlement who could go after their own women and bring them back?"

"You don't understand...the bridegroom, Marcus, was injured during the rescue, and another man, Tyron, was killed saving Marcus and me. There wasn't anyone else who could stop Nemis. Iolaus..." Hercules paused, pushing his fingers through his hair, "I know you think it was reckless, but I did what I thought was necessary...."

Iolaus mumbled something he didn't catch. "What?" asked the demigod, tilting his ear toward Iolaus to hear him better. "I didn't hear you."

"I said, 'I should have been with you,'" Iolaus repeated, his voice tight.

"Oh," Hercules responded, belatedly remembering that Iolaus had wanted to go with him when he'd set out on his latest ramblings but he had discouraged his friend, saying he just wanted some time on his own.

"Yeah, 'oh'," Iolaus replied, not trying to mask his sarcastic tone. "If you'd've let me go with you in the first place, at least you would have had back up you could count on...or I could have done what needed to be done without you having to almost get yourself killed."

Herc's sightless eyes skittered around, wondering what he could say to that. He knew Iolaus didn't like it when he set out on his own, which he'd been doing a lot of for the last several months. The silence lengthened between them until it became uncomfortable.

Iolaus rubbed his mouth and then the back of his neck wondering if he should confront Hercules. The gods knew, Herc had enough to deal with, but he wasn't made of porcelain. Part of the strength of their friendship was that it was grounded in the fact that they were always straight with one another. So, finally, Iolaus decided he didn't have any choice. They had to deal with this. It was driving him crazy and Herc was taking too many chances on his own. If they didn't deal with it now, as soon as Herc was better he was likely to take off again, alone.

Leaning forward, Iolaus asked quietly, "Why have you been shutting me out, Herc? We used to travel together all the time...but, lately, you never want me with you. Why?"

Hercules frowned, his head tilting toward the ground as he bit his lip, knowing he couldn't evade the direct question, but also knowing Iolaus wouldn't be happy about the answer. When he didn't respond immediately, Iolaus' face clouded, and the hunter supplied the answer he assumed was behind Herc's reluctance to travel with him anymore. "It's because of the She Demon, isn't it?" he asked, his voice low.

"Well...yeah, I guess, in a way," Hercules fumbled, not seeing the stricken look on Iolaus' face at his affirmation of Iolaus' assumption.

Sighing heavily as he leaned back in his chair, Iolaus looked away, trying to swallow the sudden lump in his throat. He'd hoped he was wrong about what he'd assumed. But, it appeared he'd been all too right.

"I couldn't figure it out at first," he said softly, "but, when you kept me at a distance, never wanting me to travel with you, I guess I finally understood." He sighed heavily again, blinking hard as he murmured almost in a whisper. "You don't trust me to back you up anymore."

"What?" Herc's head snapped up, his face turning toward Iolaus, consternation in his expression. "No...that's not it at all."

Iolaus just looked at him, biting his lip. "No? Then why else have you been so reluctant to have me with you if it's not because you don't trust me to be able to watch your back? Look, I know I screwed up with the She Demon, and I'm lucky you came along and dealt with her...but, gods, Herc, does one mistake mean that you can't rely on me anymore...except at times like this, when you really don't have any other choice?" Iolaus didn't want to sound petulant, but he couldn't quite keep the hurt out of his voice.

Hercules shook his head, lifting one hand in protest. "No...Iolaus, listen. You've got it all wrong."

His jaw tight, a frown of anxiety on his face, Iolaus nodded, "Okay, then explain it to me."

Letting his hand drop, turning his face away, Herc tried to find the right words, as he answered quietly, "I... after Hera's attack, I wasn't thinking straight. I shouldn't have taken off on my own...but, I was a little crazy and I just wanted to strike back at her. At least I had enough sense not to drag you with me on what I know now was little more than a suicide mission. I didn't care at that point if she killed me or not, but I sure wouldn't've wanted her attacking you."

Iolaus was listening to the feelings and the messages behind the words as much as to the words themselves, and he could understand in a way. He'd needed to go off alone himself when he'd lost his family.

But... "That still doesn't explain why you keep leaving me behind now," he said.

Herc nodded. "Yeah, well, when I heard that you had been...killed...by the She Demon, I almost lost it again. I knew it was my fault. If I hadn't gone off in such a rage, you'd never have had to take her on by yourself."

Iolaus rolled his eyes. "Right, it was 'your fault' that I went off half cocked without the least idea of what I was doing. Come on, we both know it was my own stupidity that got me into that mess...which is why I figure you've decided that I am more a liability than an asset," he said bitterly.

Shaking his head, Hercules protested, "No, you still don't get it." He rubbed a hand over his face and then through his hair. "Iolaus...I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you. You and my mother are the only family I really have left. We both know that I attract trouble like honey attracts bears...I don't want you caught in the middle of something that...." Herc couldn't bring himself to say, 'that could get you killed.' The very thought choked him up.

"That I can't handle," Iolaus supplied when Herc's voice died off. "Don't you see, Herc...that is the point. You don't think I can take care of myself. You don't think I can handle trouble. You don't trust me anymore." Knowing that he was about to lose control and embarrass himself, Iolaus bolted from the porch, wiping his eyes as he turned the corner of the building heading toward his forge.

"Iolaus, wait!" Hercules called out, then sank back discouraged when his buddy just kept going. "Well, that went well," he mumbled sardonically to himself, then sighed heavily.

In the forge, Iolaus built up the fire, and began to hammer out an axe he'd been working on for a man in a nearby village. But, after a few hard blows, he sagged, his arm lowering his hammer until it rested on the ground. It was one thing for his friend to come to him when he didn't really have anywhere else to go, and another to know that Herc didn't want him travelling with him. Iolaus knew Herc travelled as much as he did to protect his mother as much as to help other people... by being far away, he hoped to keep trouble far away from her. It hurt him to think that Herc believed he needed to be protected, too. They'd always been partners, and Herc used to think of him as an equal.

Running his hand through his unruly hair, he muttered to himself, "I've got to find a way to prove to Hercules that he can still rely upon me. I've just got to!"

* * *

Later, when he went back to the cottage, he found Hercules pacing around in the yard, keeping himself oriented by touching the poles of the porch as he passed them. Hearing Iolaus' footsteps, Hercules turned to face his friend, wanting to somehow heal the rift between them. "Iolaus, I...." he began, only to have Iolaus cut him off.

"I don't want to talk about it right now, Herc," Iolaus said firmly. "It's time for me to treat your eyes again. Come back up onto the porch."

Irritated, Hercules nodded grudgingly and found his way back to his chair. Gods, he'd be glad when he could see again. While Iolaus was washing out his eyes, he tried again. "We need to talk about this...." he said, trying to keep a level tone.

"I'm not sure talking is going to do any good," Iolaus replied. "But, I'll tell you this much...I'm not letting you take off on your own again. Like it or not, I'm going with you."

Hercules thought about that. If he let Iolaus travel with him, his worst fears might come true...that Iolaus would be caught in the crossfire between him and the gods, and badly hurt, maybe killed. But, if he didn't let Iolaus go with him the next time, his buddy would go on believing that he didn't trust him. And that just wasn't true. He'd trust Iolaus with his life.

Finally, he said quietly, "All right."

A little surprised his buddy had given in so easily, Iolaus looked at him to be sure he meant it. "No arguments?" he pushed.

"Nope...no arguments," Hercules promised, then continued, "Iolaus...believe me, I trust you. My fear has nothing to do with your capabilities, and everything to do with the treachery and power of the gods. I've been afraid to risk your life because you're important to me...but, if I'm honest...I've missed having you with me. And, I know I need you to watch my back. Everything's just...easier when you're with me."

Mollified, a little, Iolaus accepted Herc's explanation, and finished working on his eyes. But, part of him still heard Hercules saying that he didn't have the skills to really face whatever came at them. And that just wasn't true. Oh, he knew he couldn't take on the gods without risk, real risk, but neither could Herc. But, he'd faced them often enough over the years, especially Ares, Strife and Discord since the days at the Academy, that he knew he could deal with them. Well, he'd just have to show Hercules that he could handle himself...the very first chance he got.

But, he only replied, "Good, I'm glad that's settled."

* * *

When Hercules awoke the next day, he couldn't restrain his shout of jubilation. He was bounding off the bed when Iolaus, alarmed by his yell, appeared at the bedroom doorway. "Are you all right?" he demanded anxiously.

Hercules just stood there, gazing into his eyes and smiling broadly. Understanding broke over Iolaus' face and he whooped with joy as he threw himself at Herc, giving his buddy a hug and dancing him around in a circle. "You can see!" he shouted.

Laughing, Hercules clapped him on the back. "Yep...finally! So, what do you say we pay Mother a visit..and then we head out to see what kind of trouble we can get into?"

His eyes bright, a grin lighting his face, Iolaus replied, "You got it, Herc! I'm ready to go whenever you are!"

* * *

Hercules went to visit at his mother's place for a few days while Iolaus finished up his commissions for axes and knives. Having the luxury of not needing to be anywhere in particular, they decided to head out for Thrace, to attend the games to be held there the following week. It would be fun, and Iolaus figured he could maybe even pick up a few prizes in the archery and running contests. And so it was, four days later, they were on the road.

Iolaus was delighted to be travelling again with Hercules. He'd been getting heartily sick of the lucrative, but essentially tedious, work of smithing. And, he was eager to prove to Herc that it could be just like the old days so that Hercules wouldn't worry about whether he could handle himself or not. He'd put the episode with the She Demon behind them for good.

And, Hercules was very glad just to have Iolaus with him. Iolaus was chattering away as usual, whistling, and generally filling the hours of their journey with good humour, animated discussion and the warmth of his friendship. Hercules had been getting heartily sick of the long, dreary journeys on his own. There were a lot of hours between villages and towns, between one monster and another. He'd missed Iolaus' company more than his buddy would ever really know.

So, when they came to the bridge that would shorten their journey to Thrace by two days, Hercules was feeling relaxed and uninterested in trouble. When the ruffians blocking the way told them they'd have to pay or go around, he'd shrugged, and started to turn away. What did he care how long it took to get where they were going? Iolaus was with him so the journey would be pleasant and they were in no hurry.

Iolaus, however, saw this as his chance to prove to Hercules that he was as fine a fighter as he'd ever been. When the jerks insulted Iolaus with their patronizing remarks about him being Herc's 'little brother' and needing protection, it just made him all the more determined to wipe those smirks right off their faces.

Herc tried to persuade Iolaus that it didn't matter, that they could go the longer way, saying they had nothing to prove so it didn't matter what those idiots said. Unfortunately, Iolaus heard Herc's encouragement to back off and avoid the fight as further evidence that his friend really didn't trust him to be able to handle trouble. So, he just dove in, taking them all on...which probably wasn't the smartest move in the world, but he wasn't thinking all that straight. He was mad, hurt and desperate to prove himself.

It didn't help matters any when he missed the shot with his arrow. It helped even less when Herc pulled four assailants off him, set him out of the way of harm, and took on the guys all by himself...and did just fine on his own, thank you very much. But, when Iolaus had had to be pulled over the edge of the drawbridge, and Hercules had mocked him...well, that tore it.

Hurt, feeling shamed, furious with himself, he was certain that Hercules really didn't trust him, really did think he had to be taken care of. He'd stomped off, with Hercules following behind, trying to explain he'd just been kidding, making a joke. Some joke. And, no, Iolaus didn't find it funny. Unwilling to let it go, Iolaus seethed as they strode along. Hercules wasn't impressed with his buddy's bad humour. Gods, you'd think he'd said something deliberately malicious, not just innocently playful. Well, Iolaus could pout if he wanted to...Herc was tired of trying to smooth over his hurt feelings.

Hercules had no idea of what Iolaus was thinking or of how badly his buddy had been hurt by his unconscious actions and gentle teasing at the bridge. And, Iolaus was completely unaware that he had absolutely nothing to prove to Hercules...that his friend had full confidence in him and always would.

So, when they didn't agree about which direction to take at the crossroads, neither was inclined to give in to the other. Which is how Hercules ended up in a boat, talking to Nemesis, and Iolaus ended up saving a damsel named Lydia from bandits masquerading as satyrs, overcoming a lake serpent and defeating a hydra. But, by the time the day was over, Hercules had a better understanding of how Iolaus had been feeling and regretted ever having given his buddy cause for doubt, and Iolaus had proven himself sufficiently to himself that his own self confidence was fully restored.

Hera, of course, was furious that her plan to eliminate the irritating blond hunter and devastate her hated stepson only resulted in the two heroes being closer than ever, cementing their shared commitment to travel together from then on. She took out her vengeance on Nemesis...but, that's another story.

Finis


End file.
